Showing Respect for the Separated Husband

Showing Respect for the Separated Husband

There are times, of course, when it feels easier to respect your husband. Such as when he is being loving, is well rested and polite, meeting your needs and being understanding. I know first hand how challenging it can be when your life and marriage are not living up to even basic expectations. Or worse--you are estranged or separated from your husband and he isn't exactly behaving respectable.

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Recovery After An Affair: There is Hope

Recovery After An Affair: There is Hope

I could sense the fear in his eyes, as the tears began to flow down the side of his cheek. “You just don’t love me anymore, do you?” I selfishly ignored the question and continued to drown the sound of his trembling voice with the vigorous  roar of the vacuum cleaner. Frustrated, my husband snatched the cord from the wall and began to cry out, “Tell me, I have to know do you still love me?” I stood there callously, unmoved by his daunting words and then without thinking or even showing the slightest remorse I blurted out my reply: "I just don’t “feel” a thing!"

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Take a Stand: Divorce is not the answer

Take a Stand: Divorce is not the answer

Surely you've heard the saying "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything." Little is more true than this when deciding to stand for your marriage even as the world gives you every reason to walk away and not to stand. Believe it or not, there are times that those who will discourage someone from standing will even use God's Word to make walking away seem okay. DON'T BE THAT PERSON! 

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How did I not know?

How did I not know?

"I feel like such a fool!"

We hear that all the time from spouses who have found out that their husbands or wives have been having an affair and they didn't know about it. And they feel like such a fool because they feel they should have known about it. They beat themselves up with the question "how did I miss all the signs?" They feel like everyone in the world knows except them.

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No Regrets: Living a Regret Free Marriage

No Regrets: Living a Regret Free Marriage

Divorce statistics are not surprise, we live in a selfish, impatient world that says 'I want what I want, when I want it.' We rationalize the consequences of our selfishness, deciding that children are resilient, we deserve to be happy and everyone is doing it. We make decisions made under the guise of no regrets, leave no path untravelled, no stone unturned, or doing things my way, as Frank Sinatra put it.

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Are You Paralyzed With Fear?

Are You Paralyzed With Fear?

Are you being attacked with paralyzing fear? Maybe it’s your marriage, job, health, finances, depression, struggles with a prodigal child, attacks of gossip, and you feel as if you are going under. Hold on! My God has heard your moanings and your groanings and He has seen your tears! Keep your head above the waters, kick with all you’ve got! Help is on the way!

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I'm Done: What to do when you are sick of your marriage

I'm Done: What to do when you are sick of your marriage

The sleepless nights, waiting for my husband to come home from fire calls...driving past the local dive in the afternoon and seeing his truck parked there...fighting about everything...I was just plain done. I was sick of our marriage. Surely, there had to be more to marriage than the cycle of disappointment, hurt, fighting, and making up.

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Created to Wait

Created to Wait

We’re all waiting for something aren’t we? Whether it’s for the coffee to brew in the morning, the pounds to melt away, to check out at the grocery store, a teenager to return home one evening, a positive word from the doctor, or a breakthrough in our marriage, everyone can make a list of the things for which they are waiting. And I know I don't like to wait.

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How To Change Your Spouse

How To Change Your Spouse

Before you say anything, I want you to know that I am not taking him back if HE doesn’t change this, this and this…” I proceeded to call off the things on my list, things that aggravated me to the core!  “I mean how dare my husband not show me any affection, I feel like he always put his job before me, he never lets me help with making decisions, he is never affectionate, I am a people person, he loves staying at home, I love a clean house and he, well, let’s just say we are totally opposite…..”

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The Circle of Life: Cleaning the Closet of Your Heart

The Circle of Life: Cleaning the Closet of Your Heart

“Jo, you never do anything right”

“Jo, you suck as a friend, daughter, sister and so many other things because you cannot keep track of anything important”

All the negative messages we have on replay when we fall. And there are a few old behaviors that I am not going to mention here that seem all too easily accessible when I am stressed. Anyone ever just lose their temper when they are feeling overwhelmed only to dump all that stress and anger out of someone undeserving of it?

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She Ain't Right, Bless Her Heart!

She Ain't Right, Bless Her Heart!

It was the million dollar, unexpected, kids say the darndest things question, that in all my years of motherhood, I had tee-totally not prepared myself for. To make things even worse, I was standing there with the dreaded bed head, absolutely no makeup, no Spanx, no peanut butter or dark chocolate to grab for refuge, and not an ounce of caffeine in sight. I leaned against the counter in my camisole and gazed into the vanity mirror. The words that my naive little 8-year-old had so innocently just blurted out seemed to resonate in my ears, knock  my Betty Bouffant bangs down, viciously attack my insecurities, and haunt me like a growling stray dog.“Mama, how come most people’s muscles go up on top of their arms, but yours fall to the bottom?”  

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How To Let Go Of Bad Habits

How To Let Go Of Bad Habits

You’ve got to be kidding me! There has to be something wrong with these scales! Maybe the battery is low, maybe the bathroom floor is uneven, could it be the extra bracelet I was wearing, maybe the way I was standing on them, the dangling earrings, the way I boofed my hair….. I mean hair product has to weigh something right?!?!?

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I Can't Forgive Myself

I Can't Forgive Myself

Forgiveness is not easy but it's also not optional. Our partner in ministry, Beverly Weeks, has shared before so eloquently about forgiveness and how it can be hard to let go of the pain that has been inflicted by others through their harsh words or unkind actions. As I was reading I thought, what about all of those folks who are struggling with not being able to forgive themselves?

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