“Honey, I have lined up my mom to watch the kids today. I want to take you to your favorite shops to buy you a new outfit. I have got all day, and when we have finished there, let’s just hang out together at the Olive Garden and then we will head over to your favorite chocolate store!"
No sooner than the words had left his lips, I just wanted to jump on his lap, give him a big kiss, and…. well that’s a whole notha devotion! Honeychild, you might want to close your eyes before you read this next line, I ain’t gonna lie, my husband’s words sent me into a Holy Ghost tizzy and I could not help but throw my hands up in the air and start shouting!
You see, when my husband pulled me close and whispered in my ear his little idea of a his and her shopping excursion, (hmm…ladies help me explain this) it was like a wife saying to her husband,"Honey, I have lined up my mom to watch the kids today. I want to take you to your favorite sports shop, buy you a new boat or a new motorcycle. I have got all day, and when we have finished there I want to make love to you over and over until the sun rises!" Now all the men are shouting GLORY!
Husbands, put fuel in her love tank!
Brothers in Christ, listen closely... if you want to turn your wife on without getting naked and have it lead to...uhmm let's see... getting naked for a possible rendezvous, then it just might be time to get creative with putting a little fuel in her love tank!
Some suggestions for you...
Tell her she is beautiful. I can’t tell you how it makes me feel when I am standing there looking at myself in the mirror, feeling so insecure with the stretch marks, the sprigs of graying hair...then my husband pulls me close and says, 'you are so beautiful.' I will tell you that those three little words have a way of changing my attitude and mindset. I feel more comfortable getting naked with my spouse when he has affirmed me in that area. Author Dr. Gary Chapman shares in his book, The Five Love Languages, (a must read for all couples) that women desire words of affirmation. Don’t just do it in private, but make a habit of bragging on your wife in front of her friends and her family. You continue to do this and I assure you she will have the bed sheets turned back!
Say I love You. For a long time that was hard for my husband. He was raised in a family with four brothers and there was just not a lot of affection shown. Men, may I share something? Don’t assume she knows it, tell her you love her. You may not feel the need to say it with words, but I will share with you that EVERY wife has the need to hear it!
Turn off the electronics. I promise you that intimate conversations will lead to intimacy in other areas! Your wife is made to crave that emotional attachment. At our house we call this couch time, or in our case we live out in the country we call it porch time; no kids, distractions, television, or cell phones; just 15 minutes of uninterrupted conversation to talk about our day, our struggles, our desires. Better yet, get healthy together, take a walk around the block.
Romance Her. Read Song of Solomon together- it will lead to giggling, snuggling, and guaranteed lights out! Chocolate, Olive Garden, Chocolate, Love Notes, Chocolate, Shopping, Chocolate, kissing, touching, Chocolate...squeeze her hiney (she may have a heart attack but squeeze it any way.) P.S. Did I mention that dark chocolate is good for your sex life?
Pray together. I don’t mean "Lord, help me not to strangle this woman or this man" or "Lord, have mercy." When a couple prays together on a regular basis, the spiritual intimacy between that husband and wife is greatly increased. It is difficult to stay angry or annoyed with someone for whom you are praying. Husbands, take your wife by the hand and keep your words simple. This is not a time to preach to your spouse. My husband and I use this time to share our hopes, dreams and concerns with God, to pray for our children, our finances. It helps us to keep our focus on where it belongs. It reminds us to keep Jesus Christ as the center of our marriage. I can think of nothing more intimate than when my husband begins to pray for me, my job, my relationships, my fears…
Pick up a copy of Dr. Chapman’s book. Reading it impacted our marriage greatly. Find out what your spouse’s love language is and start speaking it. It might be awkard at first but as you commit to it and repeat it, with time it will become part of who you are. Happy Snuggling, Turn her on!
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