Your marriage is like a vineyard, lots of room to romp and play, the sweetest fruit, it's a safe place of pleasure and growth. But we've got to guard that fruit from anything that will come against it that seeks to destroy what we're building together with God. It's time to affair proof your marriage!
Then you must protect me from the little foxes, foxes on the prowl, foxes who would like nothing better than to get into our flowering garden. ~Song of Solomon 2:15
The enemy is clever like a fox. We saw in the Garden of Gethsemane that he chose to slink away to wait for a more opportune time to come against Christ. If Satan was scheming that way against the Son of God, then you know he is planning attacks on you and your marriage. Adultery doesn't just happen. David didn't just wake up and decide to sleep with someone else's wife.
Do You Need to Affair Proof Your Marriage?
Don't think your marriage needs protection from foxes or affair proofing? Here are a few simple indicators that your marriage may require protecting:
- You and your spouse don't eat dinner together regularly
- You and/or your spouse work full time
- You and/or your spouse watch a lot of TV
- You and/or your spouse don't attend church together regularly
- You or your spouse has had an extramarital affair, including emotional affairs
- You and your spouse are human
- You are married
- You are breathing
So how do we protect and affair proof our marriages? Temptation has always and will always exist, so the best way to turn from it is to limit the opportunities to fail. Most adulterous relationships begin as friendships, as seemingly innocent business lunches or time spent alone with someone of the opposite gender. So you've got to protect and affair proof your marriage from the fox of adultery by deciding upon the ways you will avoid being in a position to fail.
Things we WILL NOT do with a person of the opposite gender:
- Ride alone in a car
- Dine- breakfast, lunch, dinner, coffee, etc
- Go into the place of residence, unless spouse is home
- Meet behind closed doors or confide in a person of the opposite gender. A person of the opposite gender cannot be an accountability partner or confidante
- During business trips, no in hotel room meetings and the front desk to disable all pay movies and adult television stations. If you have to, ask to have the TV removed from the room!
It's not just a matter of choosing what NOT to do...in the course of transforming your thinking about the vineyard of our marriage, you must chose to do things that protect, enrich, nurture and grow a strong marriage with deep roots in the Word of God.
Things we WILL do with our spouse to protect and nurture our marriage:
- Watch and remain guarded regarding platonic touches
- Pour love, respect and attention onto each other
- Share an email account and passwords to email/facebook accounts including work accounts
- Have accountability software on ALL computers, with a third party accountability partner and discuss computer history BEFORE deleting it
- Give each other the benefit of the doubt first, before assuming the worst
Well, here's a bonus...want to really REV UP your marriage and sweeten its fruit? Put the kids in bed, light the candles in your bedroom, get under the covers and read Song of Solomon together out loud. *wink*
Have you experienced the fruit of protecting your marriage from the little foxes? How do YOU affair proof YOUR MARRIAGE? Tell us about it!
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